How Addiction Affects Lives Of Everyone Affiliated With The Addict, Part 2

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My son’s continued fight with addiciton

In Part 1, you have seen my son’s journey up through high school. He did go on to college and graduate, but his addiction got worse. I had moved up to Sacramento, and so he was living with his dad now, who was in a band where there was lots of partying, and my son saw this as a “normal” way of life.

We didn’t know he was an addict yet, but he found alcohol and loved it! The thing was he became like Jekyll and Hyde, and a very dark side came out when he drank. He was not abiding by my ex-husband’s rules and was getting in trouble with the law, where he was getting paranoid and the police were called to his home.

He kicked him out on the streets, where he went from friend’s house to friend’s house, and eventually on the streets, where he started doing heroin and meth. He overdosed several times and had to be revived. He couldn’t keep a job and was burning bridges along the way.

As a mom, knowing he was on the streets and exposed to possible danger, dwelled on my mind! I felt helpless, but prayed as I have never prayed before, that God keeps him safe! I did not want that phone call that all parents dread!

An Addict Doing Drugs

Finally agreed to enter a facilty that was recommended

For years he would not admit that he was an addict and thought he could do this on his own. Finally, when he was almost 30 he finally admitted that. For years he went from rehab to rehab, to the streets. I found a place in Sacramento, Teen Challenge, that was a reputable Christian rehab program, and he agreed to enter this facility.

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There was a waiting list, so he stayed with us until there was an opening. After 1 week with us, while we were at work he decided to go for a walk, which took him to a convenience store where he got drunk and was mugged, hit in the head, and his bag was stolen with his wallet, phone and important papers.

He was not at the house when we got home from work, so my younger son and I went looking for him until it was almost dark but decided to go back home and see if he was there. He was, and that is when we found out about the mugging.

I was so angry and told him to sleep it off. After about 4 months living with us, he had time to detox and get into the facility,

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He became clean and sober for almost 3 years after his stay at Team Challenge. He was working doing landscaping jobs and had bought a car. Things were going well and he was even thinking of opening his own landscaping business.

Had an accident and end up hooked on pain pills

Then a lady driving a truck for a company while on the freeway had side-swiped my son where he rolled over several times before ending up in the bushes on the side of the freeway. He was lucky he didn’t hit other cars or even live through his ordeal.

His car was totaled. His aunt, who was a paralegal, attained a lawyer for him, as the person driving claimed she was not at fault. The case went to court and he ended up with a settlement.

He ended up in the hospital for a while with minor injuries but was in pain with back problems. He did not tell the doctor he was an addict, and so took the pain pills and became addicted, lost his job, and ended up on the streets again.

Things got worse, as he ended up getting a DUI that cost him a lot of money, lost his license, and had to attend court-appointed classes! God was with him again, as he was lucky to be alive! With advice from my family and friends, I decided to do “tough love” and tell him it is up to him to get back to sobriety.

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Closing Thoughts

I know there are so many people and families out there affected by addiction, and how it can tear families apart. If you or someone you know is a recovered addict or family member, please share your story on your road to recovery.

If we can help other people who have addictions and give them hope and ways to have the strength to get through this, and most of all DO NOT GIVE UP ON THEM, I see it as a purpose in life. It takes a lot of “tough love”, patience, lots of LOVE, and the strength to not enable them, and understand that they have to want to get sober and admit they are an addict before they will move forward in a positive direction.

There will be many times they will relapse which in our case, took years not months, and in and out of many rehab centers. It also takes good insurance, which he had eventually to get the care and help he needed

SAMHSA’s National Helpline SAMHSA’s National Helpline is a free, confidential, 24/7, 365-day-a-year treatment referral and information service (in English and Spanish) for individuals and families facing mental and/or substance use disorders.

Update: After the accident, my son finally after lots of prayers decided it was time to check himself into St. Joseph’s Behavioral Center in Manteca, CA., as paranoia was consuming his life, and he was feeling suicidal. They tested him for numerous behavioral evaluations and put him on appropriate medications and continue to evaluate and adjust the medication to what will work for him.

He seems like my old son who when he is clean and sober, is a very caring and giving person, who would give you the shirt off his back. He loved the facility and people there, and had not seemed this positive in YEARS!

He is taking some classes for the next few weeks, and then they will try to help find him a facility to go to, in order to finish his road to recovery! I love him and with God’s guidance, I hope he finds peace and the strength to find LIFE fulfilling, instead of turning to drugs and alcohol. God Bless!

His goodbye letter to addiction

I am including a Goodbye Letter ( To Addiction) that he just wrote while in the Evaluation Center:

“Dearly departed; (drugs & alcohol) – The time has come to say to you. The damage is done through and through. In the beginning, you lured me in, and I usually gave in, time and time again. We’ve shared many good and bad times together, and no matter what, I still thought you’d make life better. However, you led me astray more often than not. In your deceptive web of lies, I was caught. You attempted to keep me down…made me feel hopeless, lost and bound. From the start, your intention was to steal, kill and destroy… my health, ambition, purpose, and joy. You make me think you were here to help, but you made me lose my entire sense of self. Even though you think you’re really smooth, I have come to realize how you’ve distorted the truth. From here on now, when you plan your sneak attack, you won’t take me down again, for the Lord has my back. Goodby dearly departed, I must bid you adieu…we’ve had quite an experience together, but now we’re through! Signing off unregretfully, a new creation in Christ Jesus!”

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Here are some other posts you might enjoy:

How Addiction Affects Lives Of Everyone Affiliated With An Addict, Part 1

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See you soon, Denise

Posts may contain affiliate links. As an Amazon Associate, we earn from qualifying purchases and collect a small commission at no cost to you. This helps my blog to keep going. Thank you! For more info, read my disclosure policy.

You will see books below on the road to recovery, that might be helpful!

Posts may contain affiliate links. As an Amazon Associate, we earn from qualifying purchases and collect a small commission at no cost to you. This helps my blog to keep going. Thank you! For more info, read my disclosure policy.

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8 thoughts on “How Addiction Affects Lives Of Everyone Affiliated With The Addict, Part 2

  1. You’re a brilliant example, because instead of giving up after all these you have passed thorugh, you found the courage blog about it and give support, inspiration and hope to people with similar problems!
    I wish you the best luck from now on and keep up your amazing work!

  2. I knew a lot of people who were doing drugs and drinking alcohol. Some of them when to rehab and thank god they are all good now. I believe it is though for everyone. I hope your son is going to stay away from the drugs and alcohol and I wish him and your family all the best! Thank you for sharing this with us.

  3. I appreciate you for sharing your real story with us. Hat’s off to you! You’re really an inspiration & this real life story will help many people out there. You had gone through so much. It put me in tears when I read this post and the letter which your son wrote. But, I am feeling so proud of you that you didn’t give up. Drugs & alcohol addiction are life threatening culprits. And, it is much needed to make people aware and to help even our coming generations stay away from it. Much love and prayers to you and your whole family. ? I wish your son all the best. Hope your son is going to stay away from them.

    1. Thank you for the kind and supportive words! It has been a struggle over so many years, but God has given me the strength to keep going and not give up on him! After all these years I felt it was time to share this story and touch other people’s lives! Thank you for the prayers!

  4. So happy to hear your son is getting the help he needs and is returning to being his former self. Thank you for sharing about this sensitive, but important topic.

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