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Updated 5/2/2020

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Different relationships we can make in a lifetime

You will develop different relationships in your lifetime. These are a few you can develop: Spouse, Family and Children, Family and Dog or Cat, Friends, Co-Workers, Neighbors, Your Church Congregation, Social Media connections to name a few.

Possibly from your own experiences, you will find that relationships can start out wonderful, but aren’t always long-lasting. Many times we put on blinders and see what we want to see, and not the underlying reality of the relationship, and end up leaving or sabotaging our connection.

Relationships take cultivating and compromise to stay strong and grow in a positive direction. You also might have to face the fact you aren’t compatible and move down a different road.

Don’t be discouraged as many connections can give you a lifetime of friendship, happiness, loyalty, love, wonderful memories, security, and a life where you grow as a person in all your relationships.

Dating, meeting your spouse, marriage

When we leave the nest and are on our own, we might run into or be introduced to someone that we have a connection with, and who can be our best friend. That friendship could turn into a loving relationship that turns into a marriage.

After marriage, kids could be in the near future, or for some, children are not a part of the plan. They focus on their spouse and career.

They say you should discuss kids, career, where you live, religious beliefs, and other important factors before you make a commitment so you don’t find out later you are on opposite sides of the spectrum. By doing this, you might stop a huge disagreement that could end the relationship.

Marriages can deteriorate, and once what attracted us to them and made us fall in love with them, it is no longer there. Divorce many times is the result, as they have gone in different directions.

Some resolve their differences through family counseling and find a way to a healthy, loving relationship again.

Different relationships could include addiction

When we first meet that person you might not see they have a drinking or drug problem, but over time they start and succumb to the addiction or become abusive. This is the hard part as you fell in love with someone charming, responsible, and liked by everyone.

You might be uncomfortable doing this, but Google them and see if they have any record of domestic violence. Your life could depend on this as time goes on and you see that side of their personality.

I grew up in a family where my dad became an alcoholic in time and saw how it affected my mom and our family unit. Even though she was not happy, she would not leave him, as she did not want him to end up on the streets. Growing up in a dysfunctional family had a dramatic effect on my sister’s and my life.

I hope more people become aware of this disease and think enough of themselves in finding out the family history of the person you might be making a lifetime commitment to. It can make the difference between possible family dysfunction and misery carried down to your children or a life of happiness and contentment.

Careers and finance can create problems later in the relationship

Some become married to their careers and rarely see their spouse, which can create a sense of loneliness, unhappiness, and stress for their partner. It might be a good idea to sit down and discuss ways to have date nights and find ways to have time together.

Finance can become a problem, as one could be a saver and one is a spender, and they cannot compromise on how to manage the money creating arguments and stress on how to resolve the problem.

I found it was better to have separate accounts and a joint account for paying the bills. You will need to agree on who will pay the bills to have an organized household. Money is one of the top issues in breaking up marriages and relationships.

Maybe one doesn’t like their in-laws and avoids family gatherings, which becomes a heated topic as time goes on. I know it might not be easy to like all your extended family, but this is a time to compromise and put on your best face when around them, as it will be important for the longevity of your relationship and for when you have kids.

“I define connection as the energy that exists between people when they feel seen, heard, and valued; when they can give and receive without judgment; and when they derive sustenance and strength from the relationship.”

― Brené Brown

Family & children growing up and developing relationships

If you chose to have children, this will be an extended part of your family. From the moment you are born, there is a bond that exists as a family!

We grow up learning that some attributes are from nurture and some are from nature. We can be a mixture of both.

They say alcoholism is an inherited disease, that some become an alcoholic and some escape, and then it can show up in the next generation. That happened with my older son as he was hit with a double whammy, as both grandfathers were alcoholics!

Had I known all this when I met my ex-husband and knew the history, maybe I would have decided not to marry him. I know we can’t change the past, but future generations should be aware of their family history, in order to hopefully make healthier choices in relationships. The thing is we let our emotions take over, instead of logic!

As our children grow you can see the different traits they pick up from their parents. As they get older, mannerisms, as well as personality traits, become more prevalent.

Relationships between children and parents can change as they go from toddlers to grade school, through middle school, and through high school.

When they are little they love being with their parents and many even cling to one parent or the other. In grade school, they still love being with their parents, but they start becoming more independent and develop relationships with their classmates.

In middle school they start having an attitude, think they know it all, and now parents move down the ladder, and their friends start taking priority.

In high school, the attitude continues, and now they don’t want to be seen with their parents, and live to be with their friends. They become interested in dating and dressing how they want, not how the parents want, even bring different clothes to change into!

Not all kids go through these phases in the same way, but when I grew up, the majority did! Once they get in college and on their own, the relationship usually goes back to where they enjoy being with the parents and family again. Of course, you will have some families who have strained relationships.

Once out of college our kids are starting a new facet of life once they leave home to become an adult with their own responsibilities and create different relationships of their own.

Families relationships with pets

I grew up with animals, so when I moved out on my own I had either a dog or a cat. My grandparents had horses, so I became a pretty good rider, and could spend all day out riding them.

I always had roommates who also loved animals. My kids also love animals and grew up with them too.

There is a relationship and bond that develops with our animals, as they are part of the family, and I think we are better people because of having animals in our home. They give you that unconditional love, that brings a smile and warmth to you every day!

People in the US spend around 60 billion dollars on their fur babies, showing that animal lovers do not cut corners when it comes to their pets! This includes food, vet care, doggy daycare, and other incidentals.

I know some people are allergic or just don’t like animals, and that is OK. Living with animals is where you have a loyal and loving companion who gives unconditional love and waits all day for you to come through the door, looking forward to eating, playing, or going for a walk. Most people have a passion for saving animals from abandonment and abuse when they see the need to help.

In Closing

These are just a few examples, but it shows you how things can seem wonderful in the beginning, and if you don’t nurture a relationship, it can break apart and a different facet of your life will begin.

As you see we meet many people in our life who present a positive effect on our lives, and along the way you can also develop toxic relationships, that can make you feel broken and create an inner turmoil you might deal with for years unless you get professional help.

It is up to you to find a positive direction or different avenue to keep your life balanced, and accomplish your aspirations!

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Here is a link to another post of mine on Long Distance Relationships With Family And Friends

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See you soon, Denise

Posts may contain affiliate links. As an Amazon Associate, we earn from qualifying purchases and collect a small commission at no cost to you. This helps my blog to keep going. Thank you! For more info, read my disclosure policy.